Thursday, December 17, 2009

My dreams stick with me sometimes, long after I've woken up. Last night was one of those nights.

I dreamed that I met up with one of my old friends, went to spend time with her and her four girls. We watched one of her daughters play soccer, and as I was sitting on a blanket, smiling and happy, he came and sat down beside me.

I don't know who he was, but I felt that I knew him. He sat next to me, put his arm around me and pulled me close. And it was so comfortable, so natural, that it felt like it had always been that way. Me and him.

I remember that anytime I was more than an arms length away, he'd pull me close. How it felt to have his arms there, protecting, encircling me, keeping me near, I can't even begin to put into words. It's like knowing that everything is going to turn out alright, that the good is meant to last for years and years.

We never spoke. We never said one word to each other. I think sometimes words can take away from the moment, can lessen the meaning. Sometimes it's just better to feel. Sometimes what's so beautiful, and so fulfilling is knowing that no words can express the depth of love and contentment you feel inside. Just feeling them is enough.

The best memories are the ones were you simply exist in them, drinking them in, trying to catch every single thread of that brilliance, captured in your memory, to store it away for the future. Maybe to sip it slowly, to savor it, to exist in that one beautiful, perfect beginning, of knowing, of true understanding which is the beginning of love.

The things I felt, the love, the warmth of him, the way his eyes looked into mine and said everytime, without a word "I love you", the promise of forever, the promise of good things, of happy times and memories waiting to be made was one of the most wonderful things I have ever experienced.

And I wanted to share that with you.