Monday, August 24, 2009

It's big, it's heavy, it's wood

I love awards. Giving them, not getting them. I'm terrible at receiving things.
Except things of a sexual nature, but that's off the subject.

Anywho, today I decided to give a silly sal award to some blogs that I love a lot. In fact, I'm going to link to the post that made me fall in love with your blog. That way, you (and anyone else who happens by) can read just how great you really are.

1. Steam Me Up Kid. This post is so funny, I have it bookmarked. There's just something about the line "Oh my. I do declare! Someone has gone and taken a photo of my business. *blushes*" that makes me laugh every single time.
Whatever the topic, McSteamy will have you laughing, because her view of things is so damned funny, so original, and I love the way she puts it all out there.

2. Hot Piece of Sass. Her insight into femininity, and all of its wiles is so spot on, that I find myself laughing, and then looking over my shoulder. Sass has it all. When I read this paragraph, it was love: Why we build ourselves up to impossibly perfect is beyond me. I do it too, so no judgment here, but rarely do I so willingly set myself up for failure in life. And when we consider what an indiscriminating audience we perform this act for, I gotta ask, what do we get in return? The company of a man who doesn’t really know us? A man who stands by your side, so long as you’re perfect at all times?
Right on, Sass. Right on.

3. The Dark Tower. It was just one of those lucky accidents, and I found this post. What gets me the most about his writing is how sweet, how raw, how honest he is. I don't always know what to comment, but I find myself reading and re-reading his posts. I loved the way he adopted a stray little kitten, and even more, that he named him Gonzo.

4. tennyson ee hemingway. Tennys writes some of the most intriguing, honest, funny, and touching posts that I've ever read. Whether he touches my heart, or my funny bone, I always leave his blog feeling that there are bright spots in the world that I hadn't noticed, and he is somehow able to show these to me with his incredible writing.
In the post I've linked to, I had to include this from our own tennys: Let's get physical - by Olivia Newtown John was originally titled Let's get Physics Al; as a way to encourage young folk to stay at school and pursue a Math/Science career.

5. Cheesy. We've been blog buddies for years. This post is one of the best posts I have ever read. If you've never read her blog, it's like coming home. It's warm, welcoming, and it invites you in. Cheesy doesn't know a stranger, she's got a beautiful grin almost as bright as her hair. She is terrifically upbeat, positive, radiant, and makes me realize how wonderful life is. Part my favorite post:
Please never judge a person for the choices they make, because you can never know what they may feel or what led them to the point where they act. They act because they must. They act because they need.
I read that post every so often, and it always seems to make me right-sized again.

6. Otherworldlyone. I swear me and this girl got separated at birth. And she got the good stuff. She tells the best stories in a way that leaves you thinking "Man, I wish I said that!" She will make you laugh, she'll make you think, and she'll steal your heart. In between that, she does some of the most hilarious things, my favorite, being sexually enticing the UPS man. A teaser: Yes, that's right. I was seen, running across my lawn, naked, by the old UPS man. And there's plenty more where that came from! Whether it's naughty, hilarious, debaucherous, or involves Jack Daniels, she's in the mix. You might lose your panties, your ass may hurt too bad to sit down, but you'll never regret the time you spend with her.

7. mysterg. I stumbled on his blog one fine day. I read this post I'm linking to, and it just kind of drew me in. I ended up not only reading this post, but the rest of his archived posts. His is the first blog I check, to see if he's posted. The way he writes, the things he shares, it's fair to say that his blog had me from "if I were to stand any chance to consumate things with my long-standing object of affection, then a strategic vomit was called for". I love how honest he is with his feelings, his experiences, and life in general.
In one of his more recent posts, he writes of a love that is no more. That post haunted me, it was more than a story, it was as if for a moment, I was trapped inside the ghost of that relationship. It made me admire the man he is, that he could write so eloquently about the end, without blame, it was more of a look at his feelings, nostalgia, and ended with a song that was perfect.
Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say I love you right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I've looked at life that way

8. the girl with the pink teacup. Read her blog, and you're hooked. Become a regular reader, and you'll fall in love with the girl, her writing, everything about her. I loved this post so much. When I saw her tattoo, I thought it was one of the most beautiful I've ever seen. What's even more beautiful is the canvas upon which those birds fly. She calls herself a ginger, but I think she's exquisite. To quote the girl herself: It's almost impossible for me to describe the experience of getting tattooed without sounding like a total masochist. The outlining felt like someone was drawing on my soft skin with a newly-sharpened pencil, while the shading and colouring were slightly more intense sensations akin to being lightly pinched. I'd been warned countless times about how much tattooing hurt, but in all honesty, it wasn't painful in the slightest.* I actually thought it felt sort of ... good.

9. Roxy. Roxy is hilarious. Fun. And compassionate. I'd read all her great dating posts, and then happened on this one. It showed me a side of the Roxy that I hadn't seen before, and it squeezed my heart. I love that. I love that she shared a part of herself, put this into words, something so unexpected, that it touched my heart, and brought me to tears.
The rest of the family arrived along with a priest. The final decision was made to take him off the machine. I was doing well until the wife looked at me. Then I teared up. I couldn't imagine what they were going through. "He was supposed to go home today" was all they could say.

10. Mr. London Street. This post is dangerous. If you haven't read it yet, please do. I also never realized that minge = vagina. I had to google that shit, Mr. London Street. And when I did, I laughed really loud in a public place.
Mr. London Street is b.a. Badass, for those of you not in the know. MLS writes about some of the most random things, but keeps me intrigued. Like, iphones taking over the world, terminator style. Anyway, I have to include this little snippet of the minge story, because it's my favorite: "Listen, I know my face smells of minge but I can honestly explain. There was an accident with a Scampi Fries packet. Well, not an accident. Ivor wiped it on my face so you'd think I was cheating on you."

11. NWO. I linked to his side project, the Thor Repository. These stories had me rolling. And lusting. There was just something about that Thor guy that made me want to get to know him better. And by get to know him, I mean do some mattress dancing.
With that, Thor held the key in front of him on his outstretched hand, opened his hand, then drop-kicked it about 20 feet into a patch of bushes. The drunk stood there looking dumbfounded. “Sir, I understand that this test may take some time, so tell you what. I’ll come back in a few hours, and if you’re still here I’ll arrange a Breathalyzer test and you can be on your way.”

That's all for now, folks. My eyes hurt, and I haven't been to sleep for almost 36 hours. Nites!


Mr. Condescending said...

Whoah I love award time! I recently found steamys blog and love it too! Same with mysterg, he rocks.

Congrats winners!

otherworldlyone said...

Thanks buddy. I totally had a huge grin on my face when I read that. Oh Mr. UPS I miss you!

There are three on this list that I've never checked out. After that...I'm on my way to do it now.

Mmmmm Jenson! ;)

Mr London Street said...

Thanks Sal!

OWO, mysterg, HPOS and of course Tennyson are among my very favourite bloggers and I'll check out the ones on here that I haven't heard of.

Lana said...

i love that you put quotes, it really helps to give an idea of who the writers are. thanks for introducing me to a few new reads!

Steam Me Up, Kid said...

Thanks Sally! I'm glad you liked that post! I remember being scared to post my brother's poop, but now that I'm posting donkey dicks, I can't believe how much I've grown since then!

I'm checking out the others today. I already know and love OWO, of course.

That Sass quote is so spot on.

One Sassy Girl said...

Ugh... I adore you, too. But you already knew that.

Specifying which post you love most was my favorite part of reading this... great glimpses into the blogs I haven't read yet. And somehow I missed the minge post at our dear Mr. London Street. Priceless!
I had no idea you dug that bit and I'm so glad you agree. BTW, the ending to that story is he was a prat, they broke up, and now they're back together. People are weird... but I hope it works out. Thanks a mill, hot stuff!

Roxy said...

you're so sweet! I love that I can share both my crazy side and my serious side with you and you still love me!


Soda and Candy said...

Lovely, I like the ones I know so I'll have to check out the ones I don't (...because I *totally* need more awesome blogs to read...)

mysterg said...

Sal you rock my world!

And thanks for sharing the others with me, it seems that I am in great company.

The Dark Tower said...

Thanks for the award Sal!

Always good to know someone respects your writing and that others might just respect it too.

omchelsea said...

Suddenly I feel even more flattered that Mysterg comments on my posts. That's cool. Thanks for the rest, too :)

Tennyson ee Hemingway said...

Thanks Sal. You already know that I think you're awesome but, there I've said it anyway.

Sally-Sal said...

Mr. C:
Steamy and mysterg are both great blogs. And I love awards stuff!

That UPS story is my favorite post of yours. Nothing better than running with a bare, bleeding ass.

Glad you liked the Jensen ;)

Mr. London Street:
Anytime! Thanks for broadening my vocabulary to the use of 'minge'.

Their quotes are all so good, they just kind of lure you in. You won't be disappointed :o)

I loved that post. That part about taking a picture of your business still makes me laugh really hard.
And I'm glad you've grown into donkey dicks.

One Sassy Girl:
Your blog was just one of those amazing ones that had me from the first sentence I read. You are awesome.

Sweet, sassy, or caring, you're awesome no matter what. And yes, I loves you!

Soda and Candy:
These are some of my favorite bloggers. They write the kind of posts I wish I could, but it's enough just to be able to read them :o)

Your blog is better than caffeine. I am also a hardcore caffeine addict. So, that's saying a lot.
I just had to show you some serious blog love, because anyone who isn't reading you is really missing out.

The Dark Tower:
I love how honest you are in your writing. That makes you so approachable, and endearing. :o)

mysterg has superb taste! I'll have to stop by and check out your blog, too. :o)

Thank you for always being so sweet, so thoughtful, and still being so sincere.

Cheesy said...

Oh my sweet nasty girlie! Thank you so much... and I must say you linked to one of my own favs too.
Hugs my dear and I will have TONS of reading to do!

the girl with the pink teacup said...

Oh Sal, this is yet another reason why I fucking love you. Not only have you featured some of the most talented, wonderful and utterly readable bloggers I've ever stumbled upon, you've taken the time to showcase individual posts of incredible variety and brilliance. And that is really, really special. All I can say is thank you, both for introducing me to these lovely folk, and for your unnecessarily kind words about me. Off to check out these great new reads. xx

otherworldlyone said...

I turned around and did it to you.

Wait! No! That's not what I meant!

Just....stop by my blog. Jesus.

Sally-Sal said...

It's only dirty if it's done right... Think I might've picked that up from you? ;)

girl with the pink teacup:
Any kind words about you are well deserved, my dear. I fucking love you :o)

Turned around and did it to me? Why, you and your dad have a lot in common...zing!

Loves ya.

somebody said...