Saying goodbye.... Thanks Boston, you've been great.

I love this song. Just hearing it, I can think of some of the things I got up to when I was still young enough to believe in following my heart, just my heart, and nothing but my heart, which is a lot like closing your eyes and going by what you feel is true. It's like being blind, maybe, but being able to see exactly what you should, without being distracted by things in shiny paper, sparkling lies made up to look like forever. Maybe that's the reason it's so much easier to believe, to have faith in things like Santa, God, that monsters can't get you if you remember to keep your feet under the covers (truth), goodness, anything.

Everything.

Maybe growing up isn't growing wiser, but about trusting what you see instead of what you feel.

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I didn't mean to get off on a tangent like that, I've been cooped up for the past week or so, and the introspection sets in. The good part about that is remembering some of the shenanigans of my younger days. I say my younger days, but if caught in an honest moment (like this one), those shenanigans never really stopped. It's a fuckery without end, Amen. And my younger self, claps and laughs with glee. In remembrance of who I was, who I am, and partly, who I always will be.

That younger self, who is now still in there somewhere, that younger version of me who did things that I can now laugh about.

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*Digging a 'pool' in my front yard, which as I'm sure you know, my parents just loved. Especially when the pool turned into the great front yard tsunami of '87.

*My aunt telling me that if I looked at a dog's lipstick for too long, I'd go blind. (Btw, Aunt Jamie, I looked. I put on your sunglasses so you wouldn't notice, and I stared at that dog's red rocket for as long as he had it out, and you know what? I see just fine.)



*My grandma telling me that if I swallowed watermelon seeds that I'd grow a watermelon in my tummy. Fail. Screw you, granny. I swallowed seeds like crazy, and when I remembered like a month later (and was pretty pissed), no watermelon. Although, if that was true, I imagine that I'd look like a pregnant six year old, which is awkward. But then again, granny did live in a trailer park, so maybe they would've rewarded me with a carton of marlboros, and a bottle of Boone's farm. Make it Strawberry Hill, please.


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It's been such a long time
I think I should be goin', yeah
And time doesn't wait for me, it keeps on rollin'
Sail on, on a distant highway
I've got to keep on chasin' a dream
I've gotta be on my way
Wish there was something I could say.

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So, I guess this is my absurd Sal way of saying goodbye to 2009. Like everything that comes to pass, when the year is done, I try to remember it with fondness. I hold it close, giving it one final embrace, a long kiss, then put it to bed. The good times are carefully recalled, inspected, held up to the light like a glass of champagne. Sipped, savored, treasured.

The not so good times put away, the lessons carefully gleaned, put away so that the sharp edges won't cut, like a useful tool you hope you never have to use.

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It's been such a long time. It's been such a long time.

Well I get so lonely when I am without you
But in my mind, deep in my mind,
I can't forget about you
Good times, and faces that remind me
I'm tryin' to forget your name and leave it all behind me
You're comin' back to find me.


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There's a long road, I've gotta stay in time with
I've got to keep on chasin' that dream, though I may never find it

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And that's where 2010 will find me. Chasing that dream. Like Charlie Brown, I will forever go after that football Lucy is holding. I will always tell myself that this time....maybe this time....it's gonna be this time....I just know it's this time...gotta be this time...for sure, yeah....this is the time...



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It's been such a long time. It's been such a long time.

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